I stand,
with a knife in my hand,
my heart in the other,
and i decide,
what i should do,
should it end it all?
so easy and painless,
should i keep on going?
with much sadness,
will i leave this world,
now,
or later,
will i be happy,
or in great despair,
will i stay here,
with friends and family,
will i leave and join,
those unknown,
i let my heart go,
and i cut myself instead,
the dripping blood a sedative,
to my blaring emotions,
my blood mingled with my tears,
pools on the ground,
hurry i must do,
before i am found,
clean and scrubbing,
erasing all traces of my pain,
no one will know,
no one will see my true self,
so happy around,
so sad inside,
no one will care,
so life passes me by,
the blood is still flowing,
straight down my hands,
i wash it off,
and welcome the pain,
of the soap on my wounds,
pain acts like my friend,
pain is my friend,
they shall calm me,
help me,
save me from myself,
i dress my wounds,
pushing hard to feel the sting,
and my sweater stays on,
for the next few weeks...
It is really good. You could seriously be a writer. This reminds me alot what Im going through write now and it makes me smile not to know that you feel the same(pain is your friend) but because now I truely know that their are others just like me.
I hope to read more of your poems.
thanks girly-girl... ive been like this for awhile, and i dont know what to do anymore... im 15... and i cut last night... but i didby really want to, it just sort of happened... its like it helps me get everything out... the only problem i have now is that i have to wear arm bands to school... but oh well maybe people will think its my style... i hope, i thought i was alone... thanks
No prob if you ever want to talk you can always talk to me. I cut to and I know how difficult it is to stop. It's like a security blanket it helps me deal.
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